I’m Sorry Since It’s My Fault That You Can’t Get Chicken and Waffles Chips Anymore

This isn’t so much of a post as it is an apology to all of the fans of the Lay’s Chicken and Waffles chips since it’s apparently my fault that you can no longer buy them.

Yesterday I walked in from a long day of being forced to interact with people via my second job and was greeted by my mother with, “Well I asked the guy at the supermarket, and they aren’t getting anymore of the Chicken and Waffles chips anymore.”

I grunted in response.

“The guy was really nice though. He said that they had some down in their Hainesport store.”

I grunted again as I flopped on the couch.

“He also said that the Chicken and Waffles chips were the ones that sold the quickest even though they lost the contest.”

I was about to grunt in response again when my mother turned from her computer to give me an accusing look.

“Apparently the stupid flavor that you liked won!” she snarled.

I blinked in shock at my mother because, first of all I wasn’t aware that I specifically liked any a particular flavor of potato chips, and second, I didn’t realize that by my liking a certain flavor of chip that I would be responsible for my mother not being able to buy these fucking absurd chips anymore. However it was quite apparent from the sparks flying from my mother’s hazel eyes, the steam shooting out of her ears and the fact that I’m pretty sure that for a moment she turned into a she-wolf that I, me, myself, personally caused the extinction of her Chicken and Waffles chips.

It was only after a dig through the Interbutz that I remembered that the Chicken and Waffles chips were one of three flavors introduced for a contest to pick the next flavor. I kinda remember my mother buying the three flavors (Sriracha, Garlic Bread and the coveted Chicken and Waffles) and I vaguely remember mentioning that I liked the Garlic Bread chips the best but that’s about it. I didn’t rave about the flavor and I definitely didn’t bother to vote in Lay’s goofyass contest, yet I still managed to swing the election in Garlic Bread’s favor. Had I realized that my mother was so emotionally invested in her flavor I would have used my alleged potato chip voodoo and made her Chicken and Waffles win.

So my sincere apologies to anyone who liked the Chicken and Waffles chips (and I suppose I should apologize to the people who liked the Sriracha since that’s probably my fault too) and is no l0nger able to get them.

Sorry, Mom.
lay's chicken and waffles chips, rage
(In other news, the migration is almost complete. I still have the “Writes Like a Slut Posse” page to do, ect, ect, ect…
This has been un-fucking-believable.)

17 thoughts on “I’m Sorry Since It’s My Fault That You Can’t Get Chicken and Waffles Chips Anymore

    • I almost added a disclaimer at the bottom saying “but it was for your own good” but given my mother’s distress I thought that I shouldn’t spike the ball. ;-P

    • I guess I should probably clarify that my mother’s rancor wasn’t actually directed at me but it inadvertently came out that way so naturally I had to run with it and break her stones. The woman’s a saint for putting up with me. =P

  1. I’m glad to have a source of blame. I’ll point any future outrage in your general direction.

    Also, I have to say, I tried those before, and they just tasted like chips with maple syrup on them. So you want to bring these chips back, average American? Just dip your chips in maple syrup. Same freaking thing.

  2. Ick. Out of those flavors, I’d have to pick the garlic bread, but even then, they don’t sound all that great. You did the world a favor, I think. Your mom will thank you eventually.

  3. I wasn’t impressed with the garlic bread flavor and I never tried the others. Hell, I didn’t even WANT to try to the chicken and waffles because just seeing the bag made me wanna make a visit to the porcelain goddess. *shudder*

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